Male dress code for swingers clubs | What do men wear?
Male dress code for swingers clubs
As a man, before visiting a libertine club for the first time, you probably have plenty of questions. One of the most basic is ‘what is the male dress code for swingers clubs?’ It is not that complicated, and ultimately it is a free world. However, a few basic principles might put you more at ease. Feeling good in your attire will make you less self-conscious and free you up to enjoy the night.
On your first night out
A couple of months ago I received an email from one of our readers asking for advice about what a man could wear for his first visit to a swingers club with his girlfriend (thank you F and S
Dress code house rules
Always check the dress code of the particular club you are visiting. Most clubs have it clearly stated on their website. Some swingers clubs, like Fata Morgana, leave it rather general, others, like Fun4Two, provide detailed instructions that come complete with pictures.
But don’t assume that this is limited to the metropolitan clubs. I made that mistake when we visited the Beluga club in Calvados (France). Confident in my knowledge of the swinging scene, I forgot to check the house outfit rules. I turned up in a black Z&V Monastir T-shirt only to find out, at the reception, that shirts were obligatory for men. Thankfully the club provided me with a shirt for the evening!
Keep in mind though that all club managers ultimately want their clients to have fun. Nobody is going to subject you to an airport-like check before letting you in! (I know that some wouldn’t mind a full body-search of course).
Events and Parties
Most clubs also organise themed events regularly. Although most do not entail any special outfit, it could be that the chosen theme requires a particular dress code for that day. Be sure to check it out! You wouldn’t necessarily want to turn up tucked up in a James Bond smoking for a “Truckers and Tarts” party.
Speaking of suits, most top-end swingers parties have a very strict male dress code. Killing Kittens parties, for example, often require men to wear a black suit. For other events, like the Madame O Venice events, you would even need to rent out a full Venetian costume complete with hat and mask. However, I am assuming that for your first venture into the partner-swapping scene you would not choose the latter kind of party.
Comfort before show-off
When it comes to dressing up for swingers clubs, my most basic rule is to feel comfortable in whatever I’m wearing. Unless otherwise specified, I usually go for a pair of casual trousers and a shirt or a good quality sweatshirt.
I prefer plain colours, they are more elegant. You also want to complement your partner. So make sure to check with your wife or girlfriend on what she’s wearing. That is unless you’re attending a CMNF event (clothed male, naked female), in which case, well, things are quite straightforward.
I find it essential to remain myself whatever I’m wearing. If I have to put up an act, it spoils the fun! Your outfit is intrinsically linked to who you are. Also, keep in mind that, like in any other kind of club -or perhaps even more so- it can get rather hot in swingers clubs. And no pun is intended here!
What you wear on top is only part of the male dress code for swingers clubs. And possibly not even the most important part. In most European swingers clubs people keep their clothes on until around 22:00 or 22:30. Then it is time to change into your underwear.
Here, again, my rule is: keep it simple. I’ve seen men parading in G-strings or in animal thongs with snouts for the penis and, frankly, they look ridiculous. Others opt for a distinct BDSM look. If that’s your thing, or the party theme demands it, by all means, go for it.
I prefer to just put on a nice pair of Bjorn Borg or Sam Friday boxers. They’re always fashionable, comfortable and simple. Once you the action starts, the last thing you want is to spend an hour removing your studs and fiddling with buckles! I prefer medium length, stretch boxers. Patterned fabric may be a nice addition; it gives a bit of party feel. However, please avoid chequered patterns and definitely no baggy boxers with an open slit on the front!
Now, footwear is an essential part of the male dress code for swingers clubs. Until the moment you get undressed it’s not very complicated. You simply need something comfortable, matching your attire. I normally avoid laces as they are more complicated to take off.
Once you are in your boxers, however, what will you wear? It is ill-advised not to wear any footwear. As in gyms, saunas, swimming pools or any other communal areas where people sweat and walk around semi-naked, you should take care of your foot hygiene in a swingers club. This is even more important if your club has a wet area (sauna, jacuzzi, pool, etc). Some men change into rubber flip-flops or slip-ons. Some clubs we have visited offer these options for sale on the spot.
My personal favourite are rubber-soled slip-on shoes, such as the Geox Nebula which you can wear all night, both before and after ‘clothes-off’ time. They are very easy to take off and put on and you can even fold the heel of the shoe and wear them like flip flops.
However, whatever you do, never, ever, ever, ever, just wear boxers and socks! It is a big turn off!
What do YOU wear?
We are always interested to hear about your favourite attire and would love to know more about your experience. So please tell us what your own male dress code for swingers clubs is.
Should your girlfriend also need advice, tell her to have a look at Aliki’s post about what women should take with them to a swingers club.
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