Swinging terminology | 15 swinging terms that you should know
Since we often write about our swinging experiences, we decided to define a few basic words in the swinging terminology.
It’s not like you will not survive in a swingers’ club or party without the right swinging terminology. Let’s face it, in a club you are unlikely to get stuck on lingo! But let’s just say that when Aliki and I started we would have appreciated having someone explain some things to us.
This is especially useful if you are on a swinging site or app. Some of the words are rather self-explanatory, and others are more commonly known. But, either way, we hope to make your first step into “The Lifestyle” (see below) easier with this list.
Here are 15 swinging terms to improve your swinging terminology (in alphabetical order):
A person interested in engaging in sexual activities with a person of the same sex.
The pleasure of seeing your partner engage with a third person in front of you and with your consent. This could involve full sex or simply heavy-petting.
The practice of swapping partners and having sex separately in different rooms (although normally in the same building).
A couple which enjoys having sex in public (for the pleasure of Voyeurs) but doesn’t necessarily swing.
The practice of exchanging partners and having full sex.
When two women engage sexually and the male partners just watch and possibly touch their own partner.
Often casually referred to as an “open-relationship”, a polyamorous relationship is one in which the couple rejects the notion that sexual and intimate exclusivity is essential for a long-term loving relationship. As such, they are open to loving a third person with each other’s consent. This is often confused with swinging, but it is not the same. A swinging couple may be polyamorous or vice versa, but not always. Aliki and I most definitely are not.
The practice of swapping partners simultaneously in the same room. This might include both a full- or a soft swap.
Swapping partners but limiting activity to kissing, oral sex and/ or heavy petting.
A person who enjoys swapping his sexual partner with another. It can be soft-swapping or full-swapping.
A swinging activity that is organised privately. To attend you have to either belong to a swinging community or get otherwise invited. These parties may be organised by communities (such as Killing Kittens or Madame O) or at times by couples at their own homes.
A euphemism for the “swinging lifestyle”. However, for most people, including Aliki and me, the term encompasses more than just swinging. It implies sexual open-mindedness in general. In fact, we describe ourselves as “sex-positive“.
Sex involving three persons. In short: a threesome. This could be MFM (Male, Female, Male) or FMF (Female, Male, Female).
Bisexual women, single and available to join couples for a threesome. Called unicorns because of their rarity, but they do exist!
The practice of watching people engaging in sexual activity. Ethically it should be one with their consent – which is the case in swingers clubs.
These terms are nothing but a taster of course. Feel free to add more words to our swinging terminology through your comments!